Perfil de Jimƒåmøüs jamøüsFotosBlogListasMás  |  Herramientas Ayuda |
|
21 enero This is better than the Lord's PrayerWhen my kids are here, we pray before we eat. Return thanks. Bless the food. Say grace. Whatever you call it. It's short and sweet and to the point (we're hungry after all) with our formulaic prayer (thank you God for food, family, and friends, Amen) except in extreme circumstances. Such as this:
Me: Ok guys, let's pray so we can eat. Thank you God for....
H: Wait a minute, I just gotta do something before we pray.
Me: Sorry Lord. We're taking a short intermission at this point, please continue to hold. Apparently H has something pressing than talking to you. I know you're probably busy with your many-tasked responsibilities like, oh I don't know, spinning planets, maintaining the ecosystem, and making babies (well, not on your own, wink wink, we like to think we have something to do with it too). If you can just ask the other billion or so people on the planet who are waiting for your attention to hang tight for a second, I am sure there is a little girl in this house who will have a few words to share with you in a moment.
H: OK, I'm back.
Me: Well God, it looks like we're ready to disco now, so thanks for hanging on so politely. We just wanted to say "hey" and "good job" on the food we have here. You know, you really grew that chicken we're about to eat mighty finely and all, just too bad we had to suck its lungs out in a big machine to kill it so we can have it for supper. Please say hi to Jesus and let him know we're looking forward to him changing the oil in our car sometime soon. Oh and tell Mary "hail, sweet cheeks" just so she knows we're thinking of her. So, um, yeah. Good job, keep it up. Amen. And a little round of applause for you.
[I start clapping. Children stare horrified at me].
Well what do you expect? Next time when I say "let's pray" get your little ass in the chair and don't make me and God wait. ComentariosPara agregar un comentario, inicia sesión con tu cuenta de Windows Live ID (si utilizas Hotmail, Messenger o Xbox LIVE, ya tienes una cuenta de Windows Live ID). Iniciar sesión ¿No tienes una cuenta de Windows Live ID? Regístrate Vínculos de referenciaLa dirección URL del vínculo de referencia de esta entrada es: http://jimmoncton.spaces.live.com/blog/cns!6068C832EEEBE3C6!1992.trak Weblogs que hacen referencia a esta entrada
|
|
|
